In one of Fr. Jerry M. Orbos, SVD’s books — Just a Moment — he asks a powerful question: “Was there a moment in your life when you experienced God in a very real and personal way?” My answer is a wholehearted yes — not just once, but many times. I didn’t grow up religious. I wasn’t taught to rely on God’s grace. As a child, life felt messy, hopeless, and out of control. I wanted to grow up fast so I could fix the things I hated most — especially the way we were living. Back then I didn’t know it, but God was already working behind the scenes. The first time I truly felt His presence was in 2008, when I passed the bar exam. That year, the passing rate was unexpectedly adjusted — something I saw as God’s perfect timing. Honestly, if that didn’t happen, I don’t know how I would have survived it. It was a turning point that made me believe God sees us, hears our whispered prayers, and knows how much we struggle. From that day, I promised myself to live ri...
When it comes to tying the knot, civil weddings offer a no-frills, heartfelt alternative to grand ceremonies. As someone privileged to solemnize marriages, I’ve discovered the joy of guiding couples as they embark on this life-changing journey. The experience isn’t just about officiating; it’s about sharing wisdom, laughter, and a deeper understanding of what marriage truly means.
So, how does a civil wedding unfold? Let’s dive in!
The Legal Foundation of Marriage
Before we get into the ceremonial details, let’s talk about the foundation of marriage as defined under Philippine law. According to Article 1 of the Family Code, marriage is:
“A special contract of permanent union between a man and a woman entered into in accordance with law for the establishment of conjugal and family life. It is the foundation of the family and an inviolable social institution whose nature, consequences, and incidents are governed by law and not subject to stipulation.”
Marriage isn’t just a romantic promise; it’s a lifelong commitment with legal, emotional, and social responsibilities. Understanding this is crucial for couples about to take the plunge.
Rights and Obligations of Spouses
Another cornerstone of my pre-wedding lecture is the mutual obligations of spouses outlined in Article 68 of the Family Code:
“The husband and wife are obliged to live together, observe mutual love, respect, and fidelity, and render mutual help and support.”
These aren’t mere words; they’re guiding principles for a harmonious marriage. Love and respect are the glue that holds relationships together, but fidelity and mutual support ensure its strength through life’s challenges.
Preparing for the Big Day
One of the essential steps in the solemnization process is the prenuptial interview. This isn’t a mere formality; it’s an opportunity to assess the couple’s readiness for the responsibilities of marriage. During these interviews, we discuss:
The true meaning of marriage beyond the wedding day.
Financial readiness and the option of a prenuptial agreement.
Emotional maturity and their motivation for marrying.
The Ceremony: Heartfelt, Informative, and Memorable
On the wedding day, the ceremony starts with a brief lecture. I highlight:
The definition of marriage and its significance in community building.
The rights and obligations of spouses, emphasizing love, respect, fidelity, and support.
The importance of marrying for love—not due to external pressures like age, immigration petitions, or other considerations.
After the lecture, couples exchange marital vows. While the standard vows are touching, I encourage them to add a personal touch by sharing impromptu promises to each other. It’s a heartfelt moment, often bringing tears and laughter, making the ceremony uniquely theirs.
Parents and sponsors sometimes deliver messages too, adding wisdom and well-wishes. The combination of formalities and personalized touches ensures the event is both solemn and warm.
How Do You Know You’re Ready?
One of the questions couples often ask is: How do you know if you’re ready to marry? Truthfully, there’s no magic formula. Many couples say, “You just know,” and perhaps that’s the beauty of love. It defies logic and explanation.
Whatever their reasons for taking this step, my hope for every couple I’ve solemnized is simple: may their married life be blissful, peaceful, and filled with love.
Civil weddings may not have the bells and whistles of grand celebrations, but they’re no less meaningful. With the right mindset, a dash of humor, and a whole lot of love, these ceremonies become beautiful milestones that couples will treasure forever.
Disclaimer:
The manner and execution of the solemnization ceremony vary depending on the solemnizing officer. The details shared here reflect general practices and personal insights based on my experience. Always consult your chosen solemnizing officer for specific procedures.
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